Hännah: “Are you a gentleman?”
Eric: “No! I’m a SUMO WARRIOR. Duh.”
*singing to Hännah* “Go and hunt them, and find them, and kill them–KILL THE MEN!” – Heidi, spoofing Wicked
Hännah is singing a medley of “Pants,” “The Hairbrush Song,” “My Dreams Are Getting’ Better All The Time,” and “I Did It” with twisted words narrating the drama of a lost toothbrush.
Heidi, to a friend on the phone: “Hännah and her toothbrush—they have separation issues.”
Hännah, in a squeaky voice: “I love my toothbrush!”
Heidi: “Um, yeah. Told you. She loves her toothbrush.”
Heidi, singing pseudo-operatically: “Da te da! Some-times // I am su-PER! // That is … SO WEIRD.”
Ben L. to me, via Eric L.: “You hung up on him because he called you Miss Hännah and you were enraged, right, right??”
Joel to Laurel, on the merits of eating one’s eggs: “They’re yummy eggs! They’re delicious eggs! The eggs are where it’s at! Don’t you like eggs?”
Laurel, glaring, pokes Joel’s nose and remarks: “You Sam-I-am.”
Eric: “I think Hännah would like it in Emerald City.”
Nate: “Yeah, it’s all green there.”
Laurel: “Nana’s naughty.”
Lily: “Why’s Hännah naughty?”
Laurel: “I no know.” *shrugs*
Heidi: “Today is ‘Act like a t-rex day.’” *proceeds to roar and act scary, followed by Joel and the NED*
Heidi: “Ack! Joel drew BLOOD!”
Hännah: “Joel, get down and give me 20. No t-rexes in my kitchen!”
Joel: *whimpers*
Hännah: “Get down and be a man!”
*all four boys commence pushup contest*
Heidi: “Back in Jesus’ day, they didn’t eat chili because it was abominable. They ALSO didn’t have little girls who laughed with food in their mouths! Gosh!”
Joel: “Back in Jesus’ day, they didn’t have deodorant. So back then, it was like ‘Hello my beautiful wife—you smell really bad tonight!’”
Lily: “If Hännah were a beautiful woman, she’d have a nose ring by now.”
Clare: “You smell worse than your husband, Lily. Do you know why? Because you don’t have one!” *laughs hysterically*
